rosefox: Me snuggling a giant teddy bear, entirely contented. (sleeping)
Rose Fox ([personal profile] rosefox) wrote2016-05-17 11:13 pm

"You have the bridge"

X and J and I all have separate bedrooms and keep different schedules. This has led to us being the most well-rested parents of a newborn in the history of ever (other than those who have 24/7 nannies, I suppose). J naturally wakes up around 7 a.m. and I naturally go to bed around 3 a.m., so we shifted our schedules two hours each and met in the middle, doing a shift change at 5; our bodies didn't entirely love it, but we at least got decent rest for six or seven hours a night/day. Once X stopped having to get up in the middle of the night to pump breastmilk, they got to sleep their natural hours, which was really important for C-section recovery.

Four and a half months later, Kit is now consistently sleeping through the night. There's been a bit of four-month sleep regression waking (or maybe a growth spurt? They've also been super hungry and eating huge meals) over the last couple of nights, but mostly they can self-soothe back to sleep when they wake up. (This is a skill they taught themself; we can claim no credit at all for sleep training.) We've nudged their bedtime from 7 to 8 so they have a better chance of sleeping until 6. And X is pretty well recovered from the surgery. So as of tonight, I go to bed when I want to and J gets up when he wants to, and in between, X sleeps with the monitor on. Specifically, I tiptoe into their room and turn it on when I go to bed, and J tiptoes in and turns it off when he gets up, so that X isn't woken by baby-fussing when someone else is already awake to handle it. X is a very sound sleeper and falls back asleep easily once woken, so this should work pretty well.

I really appreciate that X immediately said "Yes, I'm totally happy to take my turn being at risk for sleep disruption" as soon as I suggested the change. Yay for good partnership and load-sharing. 💞

The only downside for me is that I won't get to see sleepy J in the mornings. But since he's not getting up at 5 anymore, I'll get to see much more awake J for longer in the evenings, which will be stellar.

I don't even know what to do with all this freedom! I'll be able to have noon lunch dates again! I could go to bed at 2 and get up at 10! I could get most of my work done during daylight hours! I only just finalized a schedule last week, and tonight I spent a couple of hours revising it and putting it into Gcal. But I'm really happy with where it is now, and especially with the lovely long stretch between 01:30 and 12:00 that contains getting ready for bed, eight hours of sleep, and two hours of time to myself (as distinct from work time) that I can enjoy before and/or after sleep, as I choose. And never going to bed later than 4. *happy dance*

It'll probably be a little while before my body clock (such as it is) gets used to this, but oh, I can't wait to be used to it.

[identity profile] sartorias.livejournal.com 2016-05-18 01:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Yet another tick in the column for Three Parents: Awesome Idea.
ext_7025: (everyone's a critic)

[identity profile] buymeaclue.livejournal.com 2016-05-18 01:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Your situation is the only one I've ever seen that makes baby-wrangling actually look sane and doable.

[identity profile] amaebi.livejournal.com 2016-05-19 02:15 am (UTC)(link)
It's a good thing there are no time machines. Otherwise I would be envying the three-involved-parents model. :D