rosefox: A man's head with a panel open to show gears, and another man looking inside. (examined head)
Rose Fox ([personal profile] rosefox) wrote2016-01-10 04:34 pm

"Night suits me fine; morning suits me fine"

Return of the granddaughter of the next generation of the five questions meme! From [personal profile] ivy:

1. Is being a parent roughly like you thought it was going to be?

I had no idea what to expect of this stage of parenthood, but some part of me was stubbornly certain that it was going to be just like our life only with a baby in it, no matter how many people told me that babies change everything. And as it turns out, our life is just like our life only with a baby in it. We haven't suddenly become different people. We haven't lost our other interests or our needs or our quirks and foibles. We're still us, caring for a baby in our own inimitable fashion.

I'm still shaky on identifying as "a parent" but that's gradually coming along.

2. What is the best thing you've read lately? What made it so good?

T. Berry Brazelton's Touchpoints: Birth to Three (revised edition) is an extremely soothing and reassuring book about early child development. I read each chapter as we approach the stage it discusses, so that I don't overwhelm myself with info that I can't use yet. The chapter on babies two to three weeks old says things like "it takes work and time to bond (form attachment) with the baby, so don't worry if it doesn't happen right away" and "this is what an overstimulated baby looks like; if you see this then it's time to leave them alone for 10 to 15 minutes to recover". It's the antidote to scaremongering Dr. Google. Reading it is like breathing a giant sigh of relief.

3. What artist or spokesperson would you give a wider audience, if you could?

The most obscure brilliant artist I know is photographer Zoée Nuage, whose images of gender ambiguity and transition changed my life. I'd love to see those photos reach more people who are just starting to have thoughts about their own genders. Somewhat to my surprise, Zoée has moved on from photography and is now making needle-felted jewelry that's tiny and beautiful.

Less obscure but also brilliant is Thích Nhất Hạnh. I recommend his writings on mindfulness in daily life to anyone who's ever been stymied by the (false) notion that meditation and mindfulness require a rigorous practice of setting time aside for sitting still in a quiet room. I genuinely feel like the world would be a much better place if everyone attempted some sort of mindfulness practice--we don't all have to be Zen masters, but paying a little more attention and moving a little more slowly goes a long, long way.

4. What are your thoughts about education for kids? Do you have a preferred method of schooling?

I'm firmly in the "whatever's best for that particular child" camp. Some kids need a lot of socializing and others need time alone. Some need to be self-directed and others need structure and coaching. Some learn by listening and some by doing. What matters is that they get lots of options and opportunities to find what works for them, the support and attention they need from compassionate instructors, consistent rules and discipline without punishment, and a safe, encouraging space in which to learn.

5. If your whole household could be instantly and collectively fluent in another language, which one would you pick? Why that one?

I wouldn't dream of picking unilaterally--that's a decision we should all make together. And if "collectively" means the baby learns it too, that's a different decision from the three adults picking a language in which to discuss things that we don't want Kit to know about. :)

My personal suggestion would be Japanese, since becoming fluent in it the hard way is really super hard, and it's genuinely useful for us (J's stepfather is Japanese and we love traveling in Japan).


If you want five questions from me, leave a comment, and I will do my best to think of something to ask beyond "Can you come over and watch the baby?". :)
ironed_orchid: pin up girl reading kant (Default)

[personal profile] ironed_orchid 2016-01-11 02:50 am (UTC)(link)
I love the photos by Zoée Nuage, I'd seen a couple before, but seeing more of the series is really powerful.
zandperl: Grand Unified Theory of Love (MIT Mystery Hunt team) logo (Hunt)

[personal profile] zandperl 2016-01-11 03:32 am (UTC)(link)
I would take five questions. Glad to hear the kidling is doing well. :) Is Kit their name, or the preferred online parentally assigned pseudonym?
sfred: (Default)

[personal profile] sfred 2016-01-11 11:11 am (UTC)(link)
I love the name Kit - it was on my shortlist for myself (discounted because it's a possible abbreviation of a niecephew's name and I didn't want to remove it as an option for them).

I would take five questions too, if any spring to mind.
sfred: (Default)

[personal profile] sfred 2016-01-12 09:26 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you :-)
zandperl: Satellite view of NYC: the city itself is mostly gray, the 'burbs green, and the water dark blue. (NYC)

[personal profile] zandperl 2016-02-09 10:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Finally answered here - I forget if DW notifies you when you're tagged in a post these days. :)
storme: (japanese pen on book)

[personal profile] storme 2016-01-11 05:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I love the name Kit and variants also. It's a very good name.

I would like questions, if you have any.

[identity profile] 2016-01-11 03:28 am (UTC)(link)
As a matter of curiosity, do you know yet if/whether Kit is an introvert or an extrovert? We of course met the chun man when he was 5.5 months old, not on his first day of life, but we found out the first weekend that he's a strong extrovert.

[identity profile] 2016-01-11 12:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, nice! I'm so glad you drew an easy baby!

[identity profile] 2016-01-11 06:24 am (UTC)(link)
I feel nearly guilty for asking, since I failed to answer a bunch of questions 5 years ago, but I'd like to give it a try. (And no, I cannot.)

[identity profile] 2016-01-11 06:00 pm (UTC)(link)
You don't know me personally, but if you'd like to give me five questions, I'll happily answer them.

[identity profile] 2016-01-13 12:36 am (UTC)(link)
And here you are:

[identity profile] 2016-01-12 12:34 pm (UTC)(link)
I'll take 5 questions please :)

I look forward to hearing more about how your sense of kit's personality grows. It's been interesting to me the variations of when and how this has happened for the growing number of parents in my life.