rosefox: A needle drawing thread that forms the word "Love". (family)
Rose Fox ([personal profile] rosefox) wrote2016-07-29 10:11 pm

"Her memory for a blessing"

Josh's grandmother, Trudy Zeidman, has died following a short bout of illness. She was nearly 93 and had lived a full, long life, traveling the world many times and refusing to be bound by notions of what women or older people couldn't or shouldn't do. She was alert and sharp to the end, and determined to get better, even when she was very ill; a week ago J and I visited her (and Skyped in X and Kit, which I am tremendously glad we could do) and she insisted she was going to be at Kit's kindergarten graduation. She outlived two husbands and is survived by two children and their spouses, three grandchildren and their spouses, and four great-grandchildren, all of whom she adored passionately.

Trudy welcomed me into her family with open arms. Whenever I told her how lucky I was to have J, she retorted, "HE'S lucky to have YOU!" At our wedding, as soon as the ceremony was over, she heckled us until we kissed. She was boisterous and vigorous and opinionated. And she was always willing to change her mind in the direction of being more kind and open-hearted, whether that meant accepting that her daughter was marrying a Japanese man (a big deal to a Jewish woman who lived through WWII), accepting her children's gay friends, or accepting that her youngest great-grandchild was born out of wedlock. She was the life of the party at our baby shower, visited us after Kit was born, and said over and over again that Kit was fortunate to be so loved by so many people; we maintained the fiction of X being our "roommate", but we're pretty sure she knew what was up and didn't care at all as long as there was love and happiness. I'm so glad X and I got to know her a little, and got to introduce her to Kit.

Four generations: Trudy, Glory, Josh, and Kit. Photo by Erika Kapin.

Rest in peace, Trudy. Thank you for all the laughs and love.
ironed_orchid: pin up girl reading kant (Default)

[personal profile] ironed_orchid 2016-07-30 03:08 am (UTC)(link)
That's a lovely photo.
brooksmoses: (Brooks and Suzanne)

[personal profile] brooksmoses 2016-07-30 07:15 am (UTC)(link)
May her memory continue to be a blessing to you, indeed.

And my condolences to you and Josh and X., too.
xtina: (Default)

[personal profile] xtina 2016-07-30 12:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I kept expecting to be judged because our family is weird, and instead she was warm, welcoming, and fierce in that way that only grandmas can be. I'll miss her.
phi: (Default)

[personal profile] phi 2016-07-30 04:56 pm (UTC)(link)
What a wonderful person. Her memory for a blessing.
djm4: (Default)

[personal profile] djm4 2016-07-31 09:55 am (UTC)(link)
I have fond memories of meeting her at your wedding, and I am sorry for your loss.
dantesspirit: (Default)

[personal profile] dantesspirit 2016-08-03 05:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Her *hair*! That is so awesome. She looks like she was quite the character and just simply *fun*. I'm glad she at least got to meet Kit. When they grow up, you'll definitely have to share stories of her with them, so they remember as well.

Hugs to all.
dantesspirit: (Default)

[personal profile] dantesspirit 2016-08-04 03:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Ohhh, my brain parsed the order incorrectly, still, J's mother's hair is awesome. And yes, that dress is *gorgeous*.

[identity profile] 2016-07-30 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
My condolences. She sounds like quite a character!
lagilman: coffee or die (citron presse)

[personal profile] lagilman 2016-07-30 04:21 am (UTC)(link)
Her memory for a blessing, and a light in dark times.

[identity profile] 2016-07-30 01:24 pm (UTC)(link)
I love stories of exemplary lives. The ones I find exemplary, that is. :D (Others are, I guess, at least hideously revealing.)

[identity profile] 2016-07-30 01:45 pm (UTC)(link)
What a wonderful photo! I am very sorry for your loss, but it's good to read about a long and excellent life.

[identity profile] 2016-07-30 05:02 pm (UTC)(link)
That's a fine photo all around but I particularly love Kit's expression. I'm sorry for your family's loss, and for the world's. There aren't enough people like her.


[identity profile] 2016-07-30 05:57 pm (UTC)(link)
All my condolences, and warm hugs.

[identity profile] 2016-08-01 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
I have photos like that - tinybaby me in the arms of my great-grandmothers. They mean a lot to me, as does the one we managed to get of my grandfather holding 3-month-old Miriam, a month before he died.

Condolences, and I hope the photos and stories you have give Kit joy in years to come.


[identity profile] 2016-08-01 12:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you for this.

[identity profile] 2016-08-02 03:05 pm (UTC)(link)
What?!? Of course - she visited Singapore many times, starting when I was a kid.
ivy: (grey hand-drawn crow)

[personal profile] ivy 2016-08-03 07:05 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry for your, and the world's, loss. I'm glad she got to stick around long enough to meet Kit.